Not the results we wanted, making this blog is a little harder to write.
6.
In some sports, such as cricket, to score a six is spectacular. But to score a six for Murphy at this stage of the treatment is a huge hit to our hope for how today was going to play out. Here’s how today went:
With a broken and somewhat sleepless night, Nat and I found ourselves drifting in and out of sleep with dreams of numbers. And at 6am we packed Murphy’s hospital bag, I ate (another) omelette cooked by Murphy and away we went to get what we thought was going to be a breakthrough test result. 5 hours of waiting in the admissions room, Murphy’s name was finally called. With a pep in our step, we walked off to nuclear medicine and Nat held his hand while he drifted off to sleep.
…3 hours later we received a call to say Murphy was out and ready to wake up and see us. Murphy doesn’t wake up the best from general anaesthetic, therefore it was a difficult thing to witness him whimper and cry out. While I sat with Murphy and encouraged him that everything was ok, Nat was upstairs meeting with the oncologist. It was during Nat’s conversation when the results came in. And our oncologist delivered the devastating news then and there to Nat.
Our fight just became that bit harder.
However…
Is anything impossible with God?
I believe without a doubt that Murphy will be cancer free, it is simply a matter of when. Now must not be that time. In the Bible verse shared last night from Romans 8, the second half of that verse says that we will ‘wait patiently’. Murphy’s waiting must continue. But, this doesn’t leave us question free. Nat was able to ask some challenging questions to Murphy’s doctor; questions no mother should ever have to ask.
A score of 6 is not what we hoped, but it doesn’t mean treatment hasn’t worked. Late on a Friday night our doctor emailed in her own time a comforting email encouraging us that Murphy is a fighter, and that she has great hope in the two treatments still to come. In the same email, Murphy’s primary doctor took stock of what’s taken place since diagnosis, and that is, he has gone from a 27/30 curie score, to a 10/30, now to a 6/30. Admittedly, it would be good if Murphy was now in remission, but that is not the case, yet.
Bear with me for this analogy. I went for a run tonight upon returning home from hospital, because I have committed to a training plan, and I don’t want to miss a training session. This training session is a part of a 6 month training plan for a marathon in October that I have signed up for. As I left home, I didn’t want to run, I wanted my track pants on and to eat an entire tub of ice cream. However, I laced up my shoes, put my airpods in, and set off for a late night run. I was surprised that I am seeing some (slight) progress in my fitness after 7 weeks of training. During the run it struck me that in the early days I associated Murphy’s cancer treatment to that of a marathon. Little did I realise that no one arrives on the day of a marathon with no training, it requires grit, determination and months of running in order to get ready. Within the Bible, Hebrews says in chapter 12:1b-2a - And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, 2 fixing our eyes on Jesus. This verse gives such great encouragement for us to keep our eyes fixed on Jesus, and to persevere and continue to run. As we run towards the future God has for Murphy, we are in the moments of training where it gets hard. Training often doesn’t mean a walk in the park, it is spent pushing your body to the limit. Murphy’s body has been pushed to his limit, and we are seeing progress in his ‘training’.
Thank you for your faithful prayers! It has been very encouraging all day today knowing there is a great company of people praying for our Murphy.
Dan